Proverbs 31:13-18

13 She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.

14 She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.

15 She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.

16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.

17 She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.

18 She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.

My home state of South Carolina played an important role in American independence during the Revolutionary War. Great battles took place that pitted patriot armies and militia bands against the cream of the British Army and their Loyalist allies. In many cases the war in the southern colonies resembled the Civil War as it often pitted neighbor against neighbor and brother against brother as loyalties were divided.

One such battle that took place was the Battle of Cedar Spring. The site of this skirmish is now quiet little park located about five miles from my home. In the Battle of Cedar Spring there were many heroes, but one stands out above the rest: a woman named Jane Thomas.

Jane was typical of Carolina Backcountry women during those early years. She was a parson's daughter from Pennsylvania. In 1740 she married John Thomas, and after receiving a land grant they moved down the Great Wagon Road to North and then to South Carolina.

Dr. Robert Bass, in his history of the war, begins her story: “Like a Roman matron, Jane Thomas was inured to the hardships of war….” In 1775 she watched colonel Thomas muster his Spartan Regiment and march to join Col. Richardson in the Snow Campaign; in 1776 she had watched him march his march his regiment to join Col. Williamson in the campaign against the Cherokees; and in 1779, soon after his return from the futile campaign in Georgia, she had again watched him march off with Williamson into the land of the Cherokees.  

By the spring of 1780, while John and one of his sons was fighting around Charleston with part of the regiment, Jane was left to defend their home. With John Jr. commanding the regiment camped at Cedar Spring, Jane Thomas tended the home fires with her children in their farmhouse on Kelsey Creek - where Camp Croft is today. 

One hot summer night in 1780, Tories attacked her home seeking stored patriot ammunition, and Jane organized a defense. With only a handful of Spartans who had been left as guards, her son-in-law and her children, Jane fought to drive the British away. The Loyalists fired volley after volley through the doors and windows and charged the house. As the final assault began, Jane stood and met them, sword in her hand, face blackened by musket smoke, and challenged them to “come on!”

The British took one look at Jane and bravely ran away. 

Jane Thomas was a force to be reckoned with where her family was concerned. When Charleston fell in May of that year, her husband John Sr. along with two of their sons were captured by the British and imprisoned in the brick jail in the town of Ninety Six. 

Jane saddled a horse, picked up a basket, and took it on herself to ride 60 miles to bring them food. While visiting her husband, Jane overheard two Tory women say, “Tomorrow night the Loyalists plan to surprise the Rebels at Cedar Spring.”

Bidding John and her sons goodbye, Jane Thomas immediately mounted and rode back through the night to John Jr. and his Spartan Regiment encamped at Cedar Spring to give him the news. Alerted, John and his men built up their campfires and waited in ambush in the darkness.

Soon, a force of 150 British and Tory troopers stormed into the firelight of the encampment. They were met with a blizzard of lead, and quickly retreated in confusion. Because of Jane’s determination, bravery, and sacrifice, her son and the Spartan regiment were saved. 

There is a bumper sticker that says, “well-behaved women rarely make history” but Jane Thomas is proof that a noble, virtuous, valiant-hearted woman can find her place in history and in the legacy of her family. In Proverbs 31, Solomon includes a passage that is one of the most popular an controversial in all of scripture: the “Proverbs 31 woman.” 

The passage begins with a description of a bride fit for a king, and now continues with a snapshot of the day-to-day life of just such a virtuous wife. She is an ideal of virtue, a picture of a wife who provides industriously for her family—and loves them with the ferocity of a lioness:

13 She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.-Proverbs 31:13

In this section, Solomon is describing the virtuous wife as a woman of Industry. Marriage is an economic unit and these passages give proof that God has ordained it in such a way as to show that husbands and wives are stronger financially when they work together for a common goal. 

In this verse, we see that the virtuous wife is a woman who possesses a positive attitude and a winning spirit. She is unafraid to work to maintain her home, and even to establish a cottage industry to sustain and assist her family and her own worth.

14 She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.–Proverbs 31:14

In providing for your family, do you desire more and better quality goods as the years progress? Most parents want better for their children than they had growing up. Here, the virtuous wife is not only unafraid to work with her hands to create, she uses her growing profits, increased knowledge, and godly wisdom to improve her supply. 

She wisely shops local, but her demand for quality means that she is unafraid to use imports if it is better for her family or encourages competition in the marketplace. Likewise, she makes distant contacts to sell and trader her own goods.

In recent years, the phenomenon of the Traditional Wife or “Tradwife” has arisen. In the post Obergfell era (the culture-breaking Supreme Court decision in 2015 on same-sex marriage), many women have sought to return or champion the traditional role of domestic womanhood.   

Donning sundresses, canning their own beans, churning their own butter, and even managing farms has become an internet sensation, and many women have answered the call. YouTube, TikTok and other social media sites are a bonanza for channels where a woman in homespun can prepare and cook meals, raise chickens, and pick beans in a garden for millions of fans. 

While cultural items such as these can be possess instructional and entertainment value they are not really what Solomon has in mind. The call of the “Proverbs 31 Woman” is not to be a wife on Instagram, but to be a wife and mother for her family in a godly home. An average godly home. 

15 She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.–Proverbs 31:15

Some versions include the original Hebrew sentiment “like a lioness” in their translation of this verse. The godly wife is like a huntress who seeks out what is best for her family. What a valiant woman! This is no mousy churchwife or passive cook but a calculating, quick-acting and decisive provider for her family! 

This breaks the image of the Christian wife who is dominated by her husband and who keeps silent in order to maintain the peace of her household. No, she has a hand in decision-making and wins honor for her husband and herself by her actions. 

As a woman, have you struggled over your role as a wife and mother to the point where you felt like a glorified servant? Men, have you contented yourself with an unbiblical image of your wife as a passive member of your marriage? The godly wife is a wiper of noses and a packer of lunches but she also has her eye on profitability, future planning, and working alongside her husband to make it all happen. 

16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.–Proverbs 31:16

What’s more, the valiant wife is a possessor of her own money and she may use it in such a way as to expand her influence and benefit her family. In this passage she researches, plans and purchases real estate as an investment. Even more, she pays contractors to establish a working vineyard to increase her profits and expand her holdings. 

Of course, this does not mean that every wife needs to speculate in real estate or buy and flip houses, but the godly wife is able to look beyond the horizons of her home and build for the future. 

Who manages the finances in your marriage? Do you have separate accounts? Does your husband or your wife only touch the money while you stay out of it? Some people have an aptitude for financial things and this is good—but do not neglect the joyous opportunity to share in this duty! 

Likewise, if you work in such a way as to have “his and hers” funds and savings, consider the bold selflessness of this woman before you blow it on a “girls getaway” in Cancun or buying that “mid-life crisis” Corvette to impress your golf buddies. How can you use God’s blessing of increased wealth to glorify Him together?

17 She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.–Proverbs 31:17

The valiant wife is not only willing to get her hands dirty in the kitchen, in the field, and in business, she works to improve her position. Women are often seen as easy targets for crooked tradesmen or scam businesses who seek to take advantage of people in their trusting ignorance. The valiant wife carefully selects her subcontractors, inspects their work for quality, and reminds them that they work for her. 

I have worked in trades and then for many years in finance and a woman with a careful eye and boldness to share her opinion of my work has both terrified and satisfied me as a professional: terrified of incurring her wrath at shoddy work, and satisfied by her favorable review.

More than simply being a “Karen” and a harridan to her landscaper or the sales associate at Best Buy, this verse indicates that in all of this process, the godly wife is gaining spiritual strength. Such a woman in her wisdom becomes someone whom people will seek out to do business, or gladly partner with. This does not come from being insufferable. 

18 She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.-Proverbs 31:18

This final verse speaks to a life well-lived both in support of, and supported by her husband and family. The reference to her lamp that “does not go out” speaks of someone who has profited by her labor and now does not have to work from sun to sun, but can enjoy evenings at her leisure. 

In these passages the man is not silent. It is implied that he is present and one of the beneficiaries of all this wondrous work. But he is not a “kept man,” for marriage is a two-way street. 

Tim Keller writes that marriage is a covenant; it requires lifelong endurance, strengthened by our vows. In this picture of a valiant women with resilience and stamina there is the sustaining love of her husband. They are to love each other to the end, just as Jesus has promised to love us to the end (John 13:1). 

Does the “Proverbs 31 woman” seem like an impossibility to you? Of course it does. This is a picture of an ideal and not an instruction manual. However, in our modern culture of instant gratification it can seem alien to put others before yourself—even your family. Especially when it can seem your work goes unappreciated. 

Never forget the One who sees all that you do in His name (Colossians 3:17). Proverbs 31 can seem too idealistic but not when viewed in light of the Gospel. Christ calls us to love selflessly (John 13:34-35) and your righteousness must be above the Pharisees (Matthew 5:20). None of this is possible without Christ and His wonderful filling Spirit. 

This is what made Jane Thomas pick up a sword to defend her home. This is why she rode all of those miles over enemy ground to care for her husband and her son: it was her duty and right as a godly woman, and she would love her family to the end—because Christ first loved her. 

The Monday—Friday DEEPs are written by Mike Slay and this Saturday Deep is written by Matt Richardson. To subscribe to all the DEEPs click here:

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The weekly study guides, which include the Monday–Friday devotionals plus related questions for discussion or meditation, are available for download here:

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Except as indicated, Scripture taken from the New King James Version. © Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ESV stands for the English Standard Version. © Copyright 2001 by Crossway. Used by permission. All rights reserved. NIV stands for The Holy Bible, New International Version®. © Copyright 1973 by International Bible Society. Used by permission. All rights reserved. KJV stands for the King James Version.